My Spearman Killed a F-16

Nerds!
Civilization is by far my favorite game and I can't wait for the newest version to come out on the 24th. It was a lot of fun writing this update and I hope more than a handful of nerdy strategy gamers like it.
Front Page Gossip: Seth "Terrorsaurus" Knisley Doesn't Own a Computer
My sources at SA tell me that the new front page whipping boy, Terrorsaurus, doesn't even own a computer. When he writes his articles, he is forced to go to an Internet cafe and pay by the hour. Of course this explains the shoddy and rushed workmanship on his updates. I tattled to Lowtax and whispered in his ear that his these are good grounds for termination. He is not expected to last the month.
Stupid Cat Gossip: My Cat Ate More Stuff
If you may recall, a few months ago my cat ate a bunch of stuff and we had to cancel our vacation and spend a ton of money cutting it's belly open. Well now she somehow nabbed a bootlace that was inside a cup that was inside the garbage can. She swallowed about 6 inches of the thick boot lace and it rolled around in her stomach like a yucky washing machine for a few days until she puked it up. The good news is no expensive surgery. The bad news is that my cat has downs and I am currently looking for a support group.
This Week on Something Awful...
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The Wishmaster's Valentines
The Flash Tub
The Wishmaster grants some Valentines Day wishes with SURPRISE TWISTS.
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Safe House; The Vow; Star Wars: Episode 1 - The Phantom Menace; Shame; A Dangerous Method
Current Releases
No-one is safe, except for you. Safe from bad movies that is, thanks to our life-saving reviews.
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How To Make Someone Cry
Features / Articles
Maybe if I wore a cape and ran around someone's living room they'd start weeping violently.
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Historical Figure Hats / British Judge Wigs!
Photoshop Phriday
Hats? On people?! Wigs? On judges?! Whatever, weirdos.
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Aliens Unlimited: Galaxy Guide (1997)
WTF, D&D!?
Steve and Zack encounter unknown creatures in Palladium's guide to Aliens Unlimited.
