Civilization is by far my favorite game and I can't wait for the newest version to come out on the 24th. It was a lot of fun writing this update and I hope more than a handful of nerdy strategy gamers like it.
Front Page Gossip: Seth "Terrorsaurus" Knisley Doesn't Own a Computer
My sources at SA tell me that the new front page whipping boy, Terrorsaurus, doesn't even own a computer. When he writes his articles, he is forced to go to an Internet cafe and pay by the hour. Of course this explains the shoddy and rushed workmanship on his updates. I tattled to Lowtax and whispered in his ear that his these are good grounds for termination. He is not expected to last the month.
Stupid Cat Gossip: My Cat Ate More Stuff
If you may recall, a few months ago my cat ate a bunch of stuff and we had to cancel our vacation and spend a ton of money cutting it's belly open. Well now she somehow nabbed a bootlace that was inside a cup that was inside the garbage can. She swallowed about 6 inches of the thick boot lace and it rolled around in her stomach like a yucky washing machine for a few days until she puked it up. The good news is no expensive surgery. The bad news is that my cat has downs and I am currently looking for a support group.
TOTAL WRECK - crazy-eyed hound is covered in cobwebs, has a vespiary on back, graffiti on side and savage thirst for boat fuel. Frankly, I'm in over my head. He's in room 115 at Motel 6, yours free. 555-2851
Yes, it's the perfect form for surviving a car crash. But it's also the perfect form for so much more, like surviving the trauma of reading any news headline in 2016.
The Daily Dirt serves as a column for all Something Awful frontpage writers to write about, well, whatever they feel like putting into the Daily Dirt!