I wasn't really planning on writing an update about my adventures this past weekend, but every other idea fell flat so I decided to just tell about some of the highlights. Its really just a big Daily Dirt since all of it is real. I plan to go to the same event next year, so I hope to see some of you there. We need more wizards so we can fend off the orc hordes and save the Halfling village. My parents read my updates so I left out the part where I do acid and swung from a vine into the lake and swam to the island where I met a mermaid. It was awesome.

I just finished off destroying Egypt and now hold all of Persia and the Middle East, but all of a sudden Macedon declared war on me and I was all like "wtf". I'm playing as Pontus. I like this video game. It makes me forget about my horrible life.

Frolixo: Livestock, do you have anything you want to say to the readers this week?

Livestock: Frolixo is the coolest.

Frolixo: Anything else?

Livestock: I'm gay.

There you have it folks.

Johnny "Doc Evil" Titanium made this image out of the femur bones of dead migrant workers.

- Reid "Frolixo" Paskiewicz