3 points ain't worth it man.
I wasn't really planning on writing an update about my adventures this past weekend, but every other idea fell flat so I decided to just tell about some of the highlights. Its really just a big Daily Dirt since all of it is real. I plan to go to the same event next year, so I hope to see some of you there. We need more wizards so we can fend off the orc hordes and save the Halfling village. My parents read my updates so I left out the part where I do acid and swung from a vine into the lake and swam to the island where I met a mermaid. It was awesome.
I just finished off destroying Egypt and now hold all of Persia and the Middle East, but all of a sudden Macedon declared war on me and I was all like "wtf". I'm playing as Pontus. I like this video game. It makes me forget about my horrible life.
A Message of Hope From Josh "Livestock" Boruff
Frolixo: Livestock, do you have anything you want to say to the readers this week?
Livestock: Frolixo is the coolest.
Frolixo: Anything else?
Livestock: I'm gay.
There you have it folks.
Johnny "Doc Evil" Titanium made this image out of the femur bones of dead migrant workers.
There is a witch hunt going on right now and I promise you that you will not find any witches in the pleasure room in my congressional office.
To celebrate this week's announcement of Mega Man 11 - the first Mega Man game since Mega Man 6 on the NES - let's remember all the terrific bosses we've faced in this beloved series!
For fans of meaningless awards, these awards are extra meaningless.
Buy three Epic Loot Crates for only $7.99, get a free fourth loot crate for only $2.99!
The Daily Dirt serves as a column for all Something Awful frontpage writers to write about, well, whatever they feel like putting into the Daily Dirt!