Due to what can only be described as the worst judgment call ever made by an employer, I have been hired as the News Editor at the newly-launched Planet Transformers. If you love the Transformers and press releases, check it out. If you hate me and think it would be fun to watch as I bring down a very large website with my stupidity, that's even better.
My two bosses are now Fragmaster (the Planet Editorial Manager) and Lowtax. I don't think there's a health care plan out there that can cover the amount of prescription medications and intense psychotherapy I'll be needing, and if such a plan existed I don't think either of them would be willing to pay for it.
I want my bed to look like the health department is checking for bedbugs. I want to feel like it’s on an episode of Maury getting scanned for semen.
Do all of your holiday shopping in the Star Citizen online store! We have great deals on space ships for a game that may not be released for years. Think of these as investments in your future enjoyment.
It's still okay to like Ben Stiller, guys.
The Daily Dirt serves as a column for all Something Awful frontpage writers to write about, well, whatever they feel like putting into the Daily Dirt!