Due to what can only be described as the worst judgment call ever made by an employer, I have been hired as the News Editor at the newly-launched Planet Transformers. If you love the Transformers and press releases, check it out. If you hate me and think it would be fun to watch as I bring down a very large website with my stupidity, that's even better.
My two bosses are now Fragmaster (the Planet Editorial Manager) and Lowtax. I don't think there's a health care plan out there that can cover the amount of prescription medications and intense psychotherapy I'll be needing, and if such a plan existed I don't think either of them would be willing to pay for it.
Russian President Vladimir Putin has sworn to personally investigate the murder of opposition leader Boris Nemtsov. In fact, Putin plans to use his expertise to solve most major crimes.
Finding the right hat can feel like walking through a minefield for guys. Did a murderer wear your hat? Was it ruined by bros? Are you just an idiot? Find out with our authoritative ranking of bad hats.
The Daily Dirt serves as a column for all Something Awful frontpage writers to write about, well, whatever they feel like putting into the Daily Dirt!