Well, I guess my luck has finally run out; I'm finally going to be murdered by, and due to, the internet. I'd like to thank everybody who visited Something Awful and helped make it what it is today: a website that caused me to become a much more murdered person than I previously was.
This email, one of 189 received, was from a disgruntled individual who simply cannot determine the exact reason we banned him from the forums (I'll give you a hint: HE'S FUCKING NUTSO). After re-registering and getting re-banned what seems like several million times, he decided to begin contacting all the mods and admins (myself included), and notify us of his impending plans to murder and / or sue us all. Again, this is completely rational and justified behavior on a comedy website.
Since I will soon become a murdered person, I decided to read and record one of my murderer's many eloquent and amazing messages. I figured doing this would become a much more difficult task to accomplish after I'm dead, which is why I now present to you this Death Threat From the Internet. And once again, thanks.
And you thought women had one-dimensional script intros that treated them like sex objects. Ewoks have it even worse.
No one seems to like the new Doom box art. But it's still the same old Doom Guy under that space marine helmet. Right?
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