The world of today is one of uncertainty and explosions. In times such as these, we can seek comfort by looking back on the world of the past, when our great grandfathers raced balloons around the world and spent their days constantly adjusting pocket watches and monocles. Their world was far from perfect, but in many ways it was a good deal more carefree than ours. To help refresh your memory of what those times were like, I present to you another page from my family's aged mail order catalog series. These catalogs once served a great many people, bringing important items by mail to the rural farms and cabins of old, before being driven out of business by greed, insanity, and the harsh onslaught of science and reason.
Ferguson's long arm of the law laments the latest cutback.
Simply put, if I had Johnny Manziel’s physical gifts, you better believe I would be there in the Weight Room, getting to bed early, doing whatever I had to do to be the best possible athlete I could be. I wouldn't be posting on social media about sucking titties. I wouldn't even look at a titty, buddy. I'd look at a titty and see two big footballs.
Expendable? You must be joking.
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.