| Robert Finch 1300 Breakwynn Rd. Hermanville, CA 93112 800-938-2888 December 23, 2007 Bill “Beefy” Stewart Head Janitor Hermanville Elementary School 699 Blue Jay Rd. Hermanville, CA 93112 Dear Mr. Beefy, I am writing regarding you telling me you need some people to help pick up after recess and lunch breaks. If you give me this job, I will give you my first paycheck. Thanks for your consideration. Robert Finch |
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This Week on Something Awful...
Men's Hats Ranked From Most to Least Tainted
Finding the right hat can feel like walking through a minefield for guys. Did a murderer wear your hat? Was it ruined by bros? Are you just an idiot? Find out with our authoritative ranking of bad hats.
All the So-Called 'Blatant Eroticism' in My Stories Has a Valid, In-Universe Justification
The Amazonians value combat prowess and purity of spirit. By wrestling half naked, they pay homage to both virtues by displaying their battle-forged bodies while preserving as much modesty as their society deems necessary. The gelatin in which they wrestle is symbolic of the fluid nature of battle, a concept the Amazonians call ‘akgor-gra.’
Mission Air
Even the Armor of God won’t save you from flying missionaries, terrible banditos, or Tom Arnold!
Pop-Up Ads Throughout History!
SA takes a look back at what our ancestors from the dawn of civilization clicked on THEIR computers!
Sunless Sea
My time as a captain in Sunless Sea, plus a review of Homeworld Remastered Collection
About This Column
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.
Previous Articles
- Laying The Foundation
- Barack Obama's Kindergarten Essay
- A Very Noiry Christmas
- These are the Proclamations of Captain H. W. Grieves
- Wikigroaning 3: Wikipedia Sucks and Here's the Citation
