Video game "enthusiasts" all across the Internet are in quite the tizzy right now over the prospect of getting a brand new video game console to waste their time with. In case you missed all the E3 announcements, here's a quick summary of the next generation video game consoles:
Microsoft Xbox 360 - It's like the original Xbox except it's not as big and it doesn't come with a hard drive and it has better graphics and it costs more money.
Sony Playstation 3 - It's the sequel to the Playstation 2 and the graphics are better and it's easier to yell at kids online with it I guess. And it costs more money.
Nintendo Revolution - It has good graphics and there will probably be a game with Mario on it and you can play "Kabuki Quantum Fighter" for NES on it supposedly.
To tell you the truth, I don't know that much about consoles. I don't even own any of the current generation ones. So I thought I'd turn the discussion over to an expert: A Nerd in His Shoe. He will tell you what console is the best because he's a goddamn nerd in his shoe!!
Watch Nerdshoe: Console Wars 2. It's a flash movie, so that means it makes horrible noises.
Simply put, if I had Johnny Manziel’s physical gifts, you better believe I would be there in the Weight Room, getting to bed early, doing whatever I had to do to be the best possible athlete I could be. I wouldn't be posting on social media about sucking titties. I wouldn't even look at a titty, buddy. I'd look at a titty and see two big footballs.
A real friend doesn't move until the middle of August, ensuring temperatures in the 90s and a humidity that turns boxers into moist balls of ruined cotton.
Expendable? You must be joking.
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.