This article is part of the Instruction for a Help series.
Deep until heart of earth warm a bodie up.
Wait for me Red Friend.
I cling to crack in a rock.
I rest on deep water meat forgot.
Sleep now, Red Friend.
Sleep now, until I sing again in the juice of the world.
Read how the other side endured in Words From Below.
Are you concerned that you may be a character trapped in a Tom Waits song? Be smart and learn the warning signs before it's too late. Also, it's too late. It has always been too late.
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.