Big cuts to healthcare benefits! You really are acting like a boss now! You call the toll free number on the back of your insurance card and after twenty minutes of clicking around, find someone to talk to.
"Insure this," you say pointing to your crotch.
"Insure what?" The representative says.
There is a moment of silence.
"Were you just pointing at your genitalia?"
"No," you say. "But, I'd like to cancel my insurance."
Whew, the day's just beginning and you're already shaking things up. That's the great thing about freelancing. You're in charge! Now, time to get some work done. You pack up your laptop, you put on pants. You're locking the door when you get a text from your friends. They just got off work and they want to get a drink.
Sleeping with AC is at this point a basic human right. But if you're one of the doomed souls forced to deal with global warming on a nightly basis, here's an hourly breakdown on how to get the most out of your inferno hellscape of a bedroom.
Some of the Internet's most veteran anatomy experts convened to discuss the stolen nude photos of Jennifer Lawrence and other beautiful celebrities.
We're spelunking through the movie catacombs this week. Join us, won't you?
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.