Big cuts to healthcare benefits! You really are acting like a boss now! You call the toll free number on the back of your insurance card and after twenty minutes of clicking around, find someone to talk to.
"Insure this," you say pointing to your crotch.
"Insure what?" The representative says.
There is a moment of silence.
"Were you just pointing at your genitalia?"
"No," you say. "But, I'd like to cancel my insurance."
Whew, the day's just beginning and you're already shaking things up. That's the great thing about freelancing. You're in charge! Now, time to get some work done. You pack up your laptop, you put on pants. You're locking the door when you get a text from your friends. They just got off work and they want to get a drink.
Are you concerned that you may be a character trapped in a Tom Waits song? Be smart and learn the warning signs before it's too late. Also, it's too late. It has always been too late.
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
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