Scuba Steve is a self-proclaimed "dating coach," relying on the experience culled from "at least 100 dates" to counsel pathetic dudes on how they, too, can pose for photographs with attractive women. (Tip: Use his patented "Hey I noticed you taking pictures, but you forgot one with me" pick-up line!) However, Scuba Steve doesn't rely solely upon his own "CRAZY weekend stories" for anecdotes and insights: He also cites Van Wilder and American Pie 3.
Scuba Steve employs objectionable phrases such as "scooping biddies" and "the tunes I bump in the fly whip" to help give his writing a gentle push from "annoying" to "intolerable." He claims the site exists "for the sake of humor." Sadly, this doesn't seem to mean that his entire persona is a parody of the "desperate loser's guide to seduction" industry (like the crap he touts as "recommended products"). Instead, it suggests he thinks this shit is actually funny.
You: “Hey! Can I get your picture?”
Random Breezy #2: “What? Why?”
You: “So I can show Santa what I want for Christmas!”
The singer dove off the stage and crowd surfed in a sort of reverse funeral procession where the person being carried is the only one truly alive. Touching him I felt religious ecstasy and started speaking in tongues and requesting songs that didn't exist.
There's no easy way to put this, so I'll tell it like it is. Bouillon is died. He went missing before the weekend and yesterday I found his skeletonized remains at the bottom of the #3 soup vat during one of my swims. I thought the cream of mushroom soup had an especially nourishing taste, and a lot more clumps of fur and skin than usual.
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Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.