Graduation ceremonies are convoluted, pointless, and boring, and that’s just for the people getting diplomas. The two+ hour events are almost unbearable for anyone stuck in the audience. No one likes these things. Your siblings were guilted to attend, your parents paid for it, and your grandparents don’t know what they’re doing anymore, but someone dragged them out of the home anyway. If you’re stuck in the audience, print out this handy activity sheet (inspired by third grade teachers from across the world) and try to have some fun.
After years of being misunderstood, I had hoped we finally had "our" story. I was wrong.
He had a yellow inflatable tube around his waist, the kind with a comical duck head. There was a tiny fish in one of his hands, and a trident in the other. In the background a squirrel wearing shades was water skiing.
For fans of meaningless awards, these awards are extra meaningless.
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.