This article is part of the Groggery Gibbonman series.
Of the many ghoulish ghost stories penned by Groggery Tirade "Grog" Gibbonman, certainly none were better received than "The Figure in the Fireplace," a chilling verse first published in serialized form on the back of numerous medicine-show products released under the "Sergio Cal's Mystic Pastes of the Far East" line. The hocus-pocus medicines ultimately proved unpopular due to radiation poisoning, but the hallowed rime remains!
Spending $10-15 a day on perishable organic dog food is not a sign of a decadent culture in terminal decline, it's actually real good and worth it.
The first time "fast", "decisive", and "efficient" could have been used to describe the Minecraft development team was when they snatched the $2.5 billion dollar check out of Microsoft's sweaty, shaking hand.
No lifeguard on duty. Maze run at your own risk.
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.
During the tumultuous Jacquelinian era, no fabulist or faerie-tailor was more esteemed than Groggery Tirade "Grog" Gibbonman.