John McCain spoke last week about his vision for the future of America. The centerpiece of his speech was the year 2013, conveniently just after the re-election campaign. McCain listed a bunch of amazing things that would happen in that year, from Osama Bin Laden's capture to victory in Iraq. The speech was timed to coincide with the release of a complimentary commercial:
I have a friend who works on the McCain campaign. After a long conversation about the improbable dreams of Senator McCain he provided me with an earlier roughcut of the commercial. They call it the "Lost Bearings Mix", but I was fascinated by the promises made in this alternate take.
I don't know how he's going to pull it off, but if John McCain can helicopter my hair and give me a lotto win then he has my vote.
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
Cons: causes bad nightmares. I used to have to eat beef until I passed out to have these kind of terrors, but this machine does it for me every time I fall asleep inside it.
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.