IT'S A TRAP!
I feel like 20 pounds of shit in an eight pound shit sack and rather than write a sassy, self-pitying update, I will be merciful and just do an Awful Link of the Day.
To see you through this, here is a picture of Michael J. Beverage:
Cliff Yablonski Still Isn't Too Fond of You!
In a shocking moment of truth, I was able to pick up on the fact that Cliff Yablonski just might not like you! Three pages of you, to be exact!
Now that's a spicy meatball! Head on over to Cliff's fantabulous website and discover the many, many reasons why you are not held dear to his heart.
Hows about you, me, and five uncomfortable minutes in my basement apartment next to the dusty Christmas tree that's still up from my last visit with my estranged children.
The Upper Kitchen Cabinet Where Your Roommate Keeps His Food: You’ll 'need the footstool' to reach your roommate’s 'fine selection' of 'stale cereal,' but he'll never notice if 'only a little is missing from each box.' Feel less guilty by reminding yourself that Jeff 'acts weird around your girlfriend,' and always 'asks about her.' What a 'creep.'
This ain't your daddy's globe...! .... or is it?!
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.