IT'S A TRAP!
I feel like 20 pounds of shit in an eight pound shit sack and rather than write a sassy, self-pitying update, I will be merciful and just do an Awful Link of the Day.
To see you through this, here is a picture of Michael J. Beverage:
Cliff Yablonski Still Isn't Too Fond of You!
In a shocking moment of truth, I was able to pick up on the fact that Cliff Yablonski just might not like you! Three pages of you, to be exact!
Now that's a spicy meatball! Head on over to Cliff's fantabulous website and discover the many, many reasons why you are not held dear to his heart.
Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.
Today's viral teen news beat, brought to you by Mike from the Internet!
Ignore the hype. Find out how these games will likely go right or wrong.
Doing some reps on the water bottle huh. I prefer bench press myself. Just kidding - stay hydrated.
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.