ANNOUNCER: They're mad as hell.
WORLD OF WARCRAFT PLAYER: Druids are useless now! All Blizzard does is lie and screw their customers. I'm so going to cancel my subscription for this B.S.
ANNOUNCER: And they're just going to keep on taking it.
ANONYMOUS BLIZZARD EMPLOYEE: They're losers. They are going to keep playing because they have nothing else going on in life.
ANNOUNCER: Tonight on Frontline, correspondent Hassan Mikal explores Internet nerd rage, discovering how PC game players react to bad news...
WORLD OF WARCRAFT PLAYER, while kicking a small dog in the ribs: Ugh!
ANNOUNCER: ...and asks the question, why do they rage?
Prof. BRIAN SLYTHERIN, Harvard University: Quite simply, they're faggots.
NARRATOR: In a suburban community of Southern California, Jonathan Malfoy is waking up bright and early at 1:30 in the afternoon to start his day. He is a 23 year old living with his parents and perusing a computer repair vocational certificate at the local community college, where he is on academic probation for absenteeism.
JONATHAN MALFOY, sitting at the computer and cracking his knuckles: It's go time. Mom! Is there any lunch yet?!
NARRATOR: Today isn't test day however, the long-anticipated 2.0.10 patch, a kind of update or "band-aid" for a video game, is being uploaded to his computer. But Jonathan's destination isn't the virtual reality world of Azeroth to check out the changes, but the World of War Craft community forums.
JONATHAN MALFOY, typing and talking aloud: God, everyone who works at Blizzard are a bunch of failures. More like World of War Crap.
NARRATOR: World of War Craft is a highly popular computer game with over 40 billion users logged on during peak hours. It's similar to the Dungeons and Dragons games of yesterday, except War Craft can be played simultaneously with millions of other players around the world. They are called "massively multiplayer online role playing games", and they are sweeping America's Internet-minded population by storm.
MOTHER: Johnnie-boy, I made a sandwich for you!
JONATHAN MALFOY: Bring it up here already! *expletive deleted*
Finding the right hat can feel like walking through a minefield for guys. Did a murderer wear your hat? Was it ruined by bros? Are you just an idiot? Find out with our authoritative ranking of bad hats.
The Amazonians value combat prowess and purity of spirit. By wrestling half naked, they pay homage to both virtues by displaying their battle-forged bodies while preserving as much modesty as their society deems necessary. The gelatin in which they wrestle is symbolic of the fluid nature of battle, a concept the Amazonians call ‘akgor-gra.’
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.