SATAN ITCHES JACKSON'S BOOB
Forum chump "SydBarrett" offers up this thrilling tale of romance, featuring the King of the Underworld and a secretary with an ill-advised translucent skirt:
Lice! Chicken pox! Possibly crabs or deer ticks! "Arsidubu" presents:
"AxeManiac's" gripping fable proves there's no "breast" for the wicked! Hah?
"Tech's" entry also exposes the dangers of elective body enhancement:
It's just getting started! Turn to the next page... IF YOU DARE!!!
Obviously, the first thing necessary to getting back in shape is buying a bunch of expensive knick-knacks.
Finally, a look at the candidate's long-delayed tax returns.
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