They struck suddenly, with supernatural might.
Warrior women of the South Pole. Sworn enemies of the Claus family. They were banished from this land centuries ago. Yet something had brought them back.
But though we are a peaceful people, the elves of the North Pole are hardly defenseless.
If it is war that they want, then war they shall receive.
The fighting raged on all day and into the night.
Our warriors fought with all their might.
But the joyous elves of Christmas Town are meant for making toys, not war.
And the next morning, as their reinforcements arrived and casualties mounted...
...we had no choice but to surrender to the fascist forces of the South Pole.
As the 19th century diver approaches a giant clam, a flash of brilliant golden light flares from within the shell. I emerge in a swirl of bubbles and do the timeless universal underwater hand signals for the following: ZODIAC KILLER, KKK, BLOOD OF YOUTH
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