Donald Trump has refused to release his tax returns, ignoring decades of precedent from other, equally shitty candidates. But we at Something Awful have just received a leaked copy of Trump's 1040, and although it's probably illegal to publish them, we really want the hits. So here goes!
If you're feeling overwhelmed by dire climate change news, try taking action personally! You can make a difference in the world!
Urine? Or perhaps an abundance of crotch sweat? Either way, it's a good thing you're in a karate class. This is the ideal place to covertly get some airflow down there, speeding up the evaporation process by as much as 4%.
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