Customer: So what's a new and exciting video game?
Employee: Do you like the internet?
Customer: No I hate th-
Employee: Try Weekend Web. It comes with over 80 images of forum posts per week, comments above each post, painfully annoying intros, and the shame that comes with reading it.
Customer: What? That's not a video game!
Employee: It's written by a very non-threatening homosexual!
Customer: SIGN ME UP.
Al Eingang's AUTO-FELLATIO KINGDOM
In the 15th century man dreamt of reaching the far off destinations of Earth. In the 20th century man dreamt of going to the moon. In the 21st century man dreams of sending a man to mars. In the 22nd century man will dream of something far more grand but equally pointless. But there is a group of men whose dream extends far beyond the reach of time and space. That dream is to reach their own penises with their mouth and perform self-fellatio. Bless you brave men, and Godspeed.
You're surprised this sort of thing exists? I wish I could say the same thing buddy. I think it was right around scat porn and penis stomping that I lost the ability to be surprised anymore.
Our very own bigpeeler might know a thing or two about elephant cock.
I think "joe" is looking into these things a bit too much. I wouldn't be surprised if Clay Aiken sucks his own dick though. Sing for me now, bitch!
Not to be gay, but I love hard throbbing cock. Put your dick in my mouth and cum all over my pearly whites. Make me swallow so hard I'll be shitting semen. Remember I'm not gay though.
Go fuck yourself! Oh wait.
Thank God the picture didn't load.
I could never reach.
Hey Frolixo, don't you live in Detroit? Well I know something that will keep you warm on those cold lonely nights.
This space-age device is a cardboard box with two holes in it. The operative sticks a hand in one end. The contact inserts a hand in the other end. With both hands shielded from prying eyes, a secret handshake can commence.
I'm ruined. Every dream in my life has been dashed. Fantastic product! Would buy again!
There are hundreds of stories happening on the World Wide Web. Let me tell you, that's a very wide web. Our goal at Weekend Web is to bring you the latest headlines from around the Internet. We go into the very bowels of message boards everywhere and find out what millions of online citizens have to say.