You can't become ill, but I can by reading about it.

I wish all my comments for Weekend Web could be a video of me making funny faces like Jon Stewart does, because I'd be doing it right now.

Yeah, it's caused by watching that scene in True Lies where Jamie Lee Curtis strips. Ugh.

Do you have any 2-for-1 specials?

Men never have any health problems! Prostate cancer is just a liberal lie!

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