Angel Energy (Thanks, God)
If you're an idiot in need of a pick-me-up, head on over to Angel Energy for enough treacle to gag a hummingbird. From touching tales of the healing power of angels to amazing inspirational poetry, Angel Energy has pretty much everything you could ask for in a site about pastel-colored, quasi-Christian mystical bullhockey. Witness this poem:
Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.
When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here,
that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge.
There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends
so they can run and play together.
There is plenty of food, water and sunshine,
and our friends are warm and comfortable.
Wow, I suddenly feel a little bit more like barfing in an angel's asshole. Thanks, Angel Energy!
Simply put, if I had Johnny Manziel’s physical gifts, you better believe I would be there in the Weight Room, getting to bed early, doing whatever I had to do to be the best possible athlete I could be. I wouldn't be posting on social media about sucking titties. I wouldn't even look at a titty, buddy. I'd look at a titty and see two big footballs.
A real friend doesn't move until the middle of August, ensuring temperatures in the 90s and a humidity that turns boxers into moist balls of ruined cotton.
Expendable? You must be joking.
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.