Nature's Platform, submitted by Bufort. In an order to improve bathroom sanitation, the Nature's Platform company has created a product everyone can get behind: a platform for you to erect around your toilet. Why would you do such a thing? So you can climb on top of it and squat like a dog, of course! Talk about classy; your guests will love perching atop this mighty shitting tower that overlooks the battlefields of waste excretion.
I wish there was some kind of science award for this, because if you ask me they just won the "Outstanding Achievement in the Field of Thinking Too Goddamn Hard About All the Wrong Things." The toilet has a seat for a reason. I believe it was Confucius who once said, "Ayyyy, sit on it!" Truer words have never been spoken.
You Will Read This Headline. Then You'll Laugh. Then You'll Realize You Were Wrong All Along.
'We’re going to be in trouble!' Little Sister wailed, clutching her favorite book to her chest and sobbing. 'This isn’t fun like a story anymore!' But Big Sister was not listening, she was thinking. She grabbed Little Sister’s book from her and ran into town, yelling 'Help! A book made me and my sister hurt someone!'
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.