FanPants, submitted by Charbs. Mankind has had to wrestle with the insurmountable burden of toting along seat cushions to major sporting events for years now, maybe even longer. I don't know, I'd have to look at a calendar to be precise, and to be honest, I hate calendars, so I'm not ready to make that kind of sacrifice just to determine how long mankind has been toting along seat cushions to major sporting events. Fan Pants is an incredible new invention which will abolish those cumbersome seat cushions, finally taking the human race into the next generation of comfort, a generation full of people with absolutely comically huge asses.
As attorney for the inventor of the innovative FanPants tm we are currently seeking manufacturing companies to license, purchase patent rights or enter into a royalty agreement for this timely invention. Interested parties can reach Mr. Kroll at the contact numbers listed at the bottom of this page.
When you wear your FanPants tm at a game your number could be drawn to win a prize! If your team wins your number could be drawn to win cash!
Sweet! Finally an incentive for me to wear pants! The illustrations on this page combined with the sheer idiocy of FanPants itself makes this one of the most informative and helpful sites on the Internet, ranking up there with CNN.com and that one website where the guy reviews the food he ate for lunch each day.
"Really, Holmes!" I dropped into my seat, shocked. "You are remarkably tall! What are you, six foot six? Six foot eight?"
As the 19th century diver approaches a giant clam, a flash of brilliant golden light flares from within the shell. I emerge in a swirl of bubbles and do the timeless universal underwater hand signals for the following: ZODIAC KILLER, KKK, BLOOD OF YOUTH
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