The Hacker's Diet, submitted by Abraham. If you've ever wanted to lose weight but not exercise or leave the warm glow of your majestic Unix box, then I suppose this site will be of use to your very fat ass. In excruciating detail you will learn how to eat like a hacker, stuffing burritos in your mouth in-between arguing about nonsense and complaining about Internet forums on IRC, and some how lose weight in the process. I can only imagine this mystery process involves magic of the darkest variety, because I'm sure as hell not reading all this shit.
Simply put, if I had Johnny Manziel’s physical gifts, you better believe I would be there in the Weight Room, getting to bed early, doing whatever I had to do to be the best possible athlete I could be. I wouldn't be posting on social media about sucking titties. I wouldn't even look at a titty, buddy. I'd look at a titty and see two big footballs.
A real friend doesn't move until the middle of August, ensuring temperatures in the 90s and a humidity that turns boxers into moist balls of ruined cotton.
Expendable? You must be joking.
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