Tephlon Coating, submitted by Ben. Pudgy goth-metal guitarist rants about hating Pizza Hut and takes photos of himself in the woods looking like a cross between a retarded mime and some sort of deep sea eel. A really dumb and angry deep sea eel. The site itself is a repulsive frames layout prominently featuring a rapidly blinking image of what appears to be a viking warrior.
In case you didn't know, I work at Pizza Hut. And everybody that Orders the Twisted Crust, while tasty and good, and I suggest you try it...PISSES ME OFF! What happens when we run out of dough you inconsiderate motherfuckers?! huh?! we're FUCKED! Then you bitch about how you're pizza is late, but oh no, you couldn't order one of the 40 extra medium pans we had! You HAD to order a goddamn Twisted Crust on a Friday night like Everyone else!
So to summarize what he said for you:
This is one of the funniest sites I have ever read; I just wish he had written some tortured goth poetry about the Twisted Crust pizza from Pizza Hut. Unfortunately, all his "lyrics" are about the usual lame goth crap like Satan and black tear drops and unicorns or whatever those fruity shits are singing about these days. On the up side he has a guest book you can sign so you can let him know that you sympathize with his "Twisted Crust pain" and "being laughed at in locker room" agony.
'We’re going to be in trouble!' Little Sister wailed, clutching her favorite book to her chest and sobbing. 'This isn’t fun like a story anymore!' But Big Sister was not listening, she was thinking. She grabbed Little Sister’s book from her and ran into town, yelling 'Help! A book made me and my sister hurt someone!'
I've been wanting to meet you all for the past few weeks, but I guess I cut an intimidating figure. I'm the new guy, with the cool job you've all surely been gossiping about. Yep, I'm the Lead Loremaster, and I'm here to enrich everything we do with much-needed lore.
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