Web page about Keith having fun & his interests, submitted by John. Helllooooo ladies! Keith is an eligible bachelor looking for Miss Right! Unfortunately Keith has the grammar skills of a 14-year old AOLer, as well as a page to match. But don't let that alone turn you away! There's so many other things that could physically repulse you!

If you are looking for a guy that U have to wonder if he is cheating on U, look somewhere else, I have never cheated on a girl friend. I can be happy with only one woman. If we develope a committed relationship, you must be a one man woman, (no sharing here).

. I want to dance with you on a mountain, bathe with you in a sea, til the stars fall around u & me.. If u understand what this means, then u r a special woman...............

If U R not interested,,, do you have any friends????? They will thank you.

SO,,, let's talk. If U don't try, I will never get to know U !!!!!!! Do you believe in DESTINY ???

U R 1 romantick guy, Keith!

– Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka (@lowtax)

More Awful Link of the Day

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.

  • BarkWire.com Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver

    BarkWire.com Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver

    Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.