No longer must the cretins who fuck inanimate objects waste their worthless breaths on inflatable women. For a mere $7,500, mannequin caressers can have their way with silicone-crafted females, courtesy of Boy Toy Dolls. These replicants were "inspired by comic book and anime art," using "cutting-edge" materials to enable single-player erotic cosplay. The Uncanny Valley theory posits that people get repulsed when human facsimiles look too realistic, but such reactions pale in comparison to the disgust generated by this site's graphic demonstrations of how to clean and replace doll parts. Nothing says "loser-sex afterglow" quite like detaching a revoltingly sullied "removable orifice" from an unfeeling polymeric sculpture's facial frame with rubber gloves and a screwdriver.
Are you concerned that you may be a character trapped in a Tom Waits song? Be smart and learn the warning signs before it's too late. Also, it's too late. It has always been too late.
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.