Put briefly, Oohology is what happens when you combine the aesthetic sensibilities of 80's-era MTV and the vague buzzwordiness of anyone whose job title contains the world "consultant." What's puzzling me about this website is that, unlike most of the other sites we review in this column, these people seem to be pretty good at their jobs. Everything's fine to look at (aside from the eye-assaulting brightness of it all), and they use fonts well (though the text means next to nothing). But I still find the site completely intolerable. I don't know whether it's the stupid sales-phrases like "Unforgettable doesn't happen naturally," or the stupid "We know kung fu!" logo or what. I would hire them in an instant if I wanted to start a cool "independent" retail store, but I can guarantee every time I got off the phone with someone there, I'd call them a fucking asshole.
I guess that's what the advertising industry is all about now, though. I don't mean that in an "I wish it could all be like Mad Men" way, because a) fuck that, and b) they were just as bad then as they are now. Advertising and design involve selling a product you had nothing to do with to a bunch of idiots who, if they knew what was good for them, would have nothing to do with it. Not much has changed, except now design companies have sites, and instead of only running into these people when you had a product to sell and needed them, you can encounter them unwittingly like so many douchebag Pokemon. Perhaps, this is the true horror - to see the capitalist world for what it truly is.
Or maybe I just hate the fucking neon color scheme, I don't know.
Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.
Today's viral teen news beat, brought to you by Mike from the Internet!
Ignore the hype. Find out how these games will likely go right or wrong.
Doing some reps on the water bottle huh. I prefer bench press myself. Just kidding - stay hydrated.
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.