Submitted by Patrick C.
Satanic marks after surgery?! Pfffft. That's nothing. The Bilderbergers did my root canal and I'm pretty sure my allergist is a member of the Knights Templar. ...fucking amateurs shitting up Youtube with this pissant shit, I swear to god... This dude probably doesn't even have a single filling that picks up communist radio broadcasts.
Don't let anyone tell you that you're a wasteful, careless, selfish individual because of your shower habits.
As you may have noticed, the most popular viral videos at any given time are amazingly banal, annoying, and cliched pieces of waste. It almost seems as if the internet naturally gravitates towards the worst possible Youtube and Google video selections. So it stands to reason that if the terrible videos become popular, then the unpopular videos must be awesome! We here at Something Awful present to you AwfulVision™, our own patented service dedicated to showcasing a wide selection of unpopular videos that apparently must be good! Welcome to Web 3.9. Welcome to AwfulVision™!