Submitted by Chaddy McChad
How the fuck many fetishes are going on in this thing? I count
1) Adult baby
2) Glue/stickiness/messiness fetishization
4) Verbal Abuse/possible Cuckholding(?)
5) Voice fetish (alteration subtype)
6) Some kind of weird fascination with the fact that glue comes from boilded horses.
Holy shit, dude. Just put your dick in a vagina or butt or whatever you're into and go hog wild. It shouldn't be this hard. If you need this much shit to get off, I think it's time to just chop your weiner off and spend the rest of your life as a life-size Ken doll.
Maria Mitchell is shown holding a telescope to each eye, using them to ogle passing hunks on the street below. OOOGA! Her tongue rolls out like a firehose, her eyes comically bulging through the ends of the telescopes.
The Internet experience of 2014 has been condensed into a single article for your convenience.
Youtube user HolkHogan420 has been systematically exposing all of the Illuminati's plans.
As you may have noticed, the most popular viral videos at any given time are amazingly banal, annoying, and cliched pieces of waste. It almost seems as if the internet naturally gravitates towards the worst possible Youtube and Google video selections. So it stands to reason that if the terrible videos become popular, then the unpopular videos must be awesome! We here at Something Awful present to you AwfulVision™, our own patented service dedicated to showcasing a wide selection of unpopular videos that apparently must be good! Welcome to Web 3.9. Welcome to AwfulVision™!