AwfulVision Presents: CupcakeAndTea

What the fuck is wrong with people? Generally, coming from someone who spends their time making fun of Juggalos and fat people on Youtube, you'd think that would be a rhetorical question. But then, every once in a while, you see something that really makes you wonder what the fuck IS wrong with people.

Let me introduce you to CupcakeAndTea. She's a weird, mousy girl that still lives with her parents and who will, regardless of how cynical you've become, make you question just what the fuck is wrong with everyone.

In this first video, CupcakeAndTea tell us it's her birthday. What did she get for a present? Why, the same thing any normal, well-adjusted 20 year old would want! Hello Kitty Pajamas! Also, keep your eyes out for the not-so-subtle attention whoring here: she's keeping painstaking track of exactly how popular her stupid, self-indulgent birthday video is. Great job! High five!

Here's a fun CupcakeAndTea drinking game: every time this gangly bitch has a weird, forced, unnatural, "for some reason, i'm trying to make it look like i have an overbite" expression on her face, take a drink of Draino.

CupcakeAndTea loves it when she can finally stop beating around the bush about being an attention whore. You can tell by the bounce in her step and the twinkle in her eye that she's happy as a pig in shit to be able to cast off any pretenses of caring about anything other than the rank her videos get.

In this video, she gives us 5 random facts about herself. For those of you who would rather fuck a lawn mower than watch it, here's the rundown of her 5 random facts:

  • "I HAVE A !!!BOYFRIEND!!! (and i take advantage of his mom)"
  • candy gives her orgasms also her first date was to see "Clerks 2"
  • "hehe yeah im a nerdy girl i play d&d no big deal"
  • "ihave my boyfriend's mom buybuy way too much stupid fucking japanophile shit"
  • lol animecon lolllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll bwahahaha ahahahahahaha XD

Here's 5 random facts about me: I hate this girl, I wish she would die, I wish she would choke to death, I wish I could invent a time machine and go back in time and stop her parents from breeding, I have a 13 inch penis.

Yes, CupcakeAndTea, let me get right on asking you about dressing up like a hypersexualized version of an underage girl. I am so very, very curious about this subject and have many questions.

When you sign up for Youtube, you have the option of tagging your account in various ways, depending on what kind of content you plan on uploading. For example, the AwfulVision YouTube channel is tagged as "Comedian/Parody" because I make a parody out of actual comedy when I attempt to write it.

CupcakeAndTea fancies herself a musician and honestly, considering I have myself set as "comedian", I'm not about to cast the first stone here.

shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up

In conclusion, fuckkkkkkkkkk youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

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About This Column

As you may have noticed, the most popular viral videos at any given time are amazingly banal, annoying, and cliched pieces of waste. It almost seems as if the internet naturally gravitates towards the worst possible Youtube and Google video selections. So it stands to reason that if the terrible videos become popular, then the unpopular videos must be awesome! We here at Something Awful present to you AwfulVision™, our own patented service dedicated to showcasing a wide selection of unpopular videos that apparently must be good! Welcome to Web 3.9. Welcome to AwfulVision™!

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