The Yellow Yell was thrown out of the opera for trying to start a "USA! USA!" chant.
I don't know what UPSET GAMMY would do if he ever lost his mentor, Jake "The Snake" Roberts.
Vile Monad reached the final interview stage for the role of Federal Breast Inspector but a poor reference from a former employer cost him the job.
Vince Wolfjaw rubs every lamp he sees in the hope of finding a genie to grant him three wishes.
That's all for this week! I want to thank all of the folks in FYAD who helped give me some great ideas on how I should expand my t-shirt collection. To appeal to the Latino demographic, next week's Comedy Goldmine will be an exact replica of this article but translated into Spanish. Adios for now, muchachos!
Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.
Today's viral teen news beat, brought to you by Mike from the Internet!
Ignore the hype. Find out how these games will likely go right or wrong.
Doing some reps on the water bottle huh. I prefer bench press myself. Just kidding - stay hydrated.
The Comedy Goldmine examines the funniest and most creative threads from the Something Awful Forums. Although the Comedy Goldmine has changed authors many times over the years, its focus on the Something Awful Forums is still the same. Includes hilarious Photoshops, amusing work stories, parodies, and other types of oddball humor.