The Yellow Yell was thrown out of the opera for trying to start a "USA! USA!" chant.
I don't know what UPSET GAMMY would do if he ever lost his mentor, Jake "The Snake" Roberts.
Vile Monad reached the final interview stage for the role of Federal Breast Inspector but a poor reference from a former employer cost him the job.
Vince Wolfjaw rubs every lamp he sees in the hope of finding a genie to grant him three wishes.
That's all for this week! I want to thank all of the folks in FYAD who helped give me some great ideas on how I should expand my t-shirt collection. To appeal to the Latino demographic, next week's Comedy Goldmine will be an exact replica of this article but translated into Spanish. Adios for now, muchachos!
Transgressive author Chuck Palahniuk is here to help with tips and tricks to hacking your life.
Not what I had in mind when I ordered an Italian gondolier. This is literally just a tiny toy. Needless to say, the Italian businessmen were not impressed and I looked like a damn fool. We lost the pizza pie account and will have to lay off half our factory.
Time to applaud the man who applauds in a loop until the end of time.
The Comedy Goldmine examines the funniest and most creative threads from the Something Awful Forums. Although the Comedy Goldmine has changed authors many times over the years, its focus on the Something Awful Forums is still the same. Includes hilarious Photoshops, amusing work stories, parodies, and other types of oddball humor.