A man sitting by the pier, with a squirrel on a leash on his shoulder.
Darth Vader thrashing on a violin on the street corner.
Space T Rex
I had walked down to Subway to get a sub, so everything was going fine until he asked me what kind of bread I wanted. I said I wanted just normal white bread. Then out of no where him and the cashier both simultaneously scream WHIIIITTTTEEEE BBBRRRREEEEAAADDDD!! They go grab some bread and have an amazingly choreographed lightsaber fight in front of about 10 other customers who wanted food, a couple of them looked pretty pissed off.
Evil the Cat
I was playing basketball with my friends in the park and a couple of geezers were feeding bread to pigeons and other dirty city birds. Out of nowhere a fucked up van pulls up and this old Chinese lady gets out with a huge blanket. That bitch ran toward the birds, threw the blanket on them, got the whole thing into the van and they were out. True story.
Another odd experience happened when I was on vacation in Washington D.C., when I saw a homeless man playing a rusted trumpet and crying.
I saw a homeless guy dry humping a fire hydrant when I was visiting Seattle, going "Oh baby, you do me so right!"
I can't wait to move to Seattle.
A bar in the East Village many years ago: a midget fighting a line-backer looking bouncer. The midget won.
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
Cons: causes bad nightmares. I used to have to eat beef until I passed out to have these kind of terrors, but this machine does it for me every time I fall asleep inside it.
The Comedy Goldmine examines the funniest and most creative threads from the Something Awful Forums. Although the Comedy Goldmine has changed authors many times over the years, its focus on the Something Awful Forums is still the same. Includes hilarious Photoshops, amusing work stories, parodies, and other types of oddball humor.