Pirates have long been a boon for the advertising industry. Who could forget the delightful Captain Crunch, or the villainous Long John Silver, or the filthy wife beater, the Gorton's Fisherman? Pirates send a powerful message to people, which is to avoid scurvy. Apparently, it also carries a second, secret message to buy the product they're shilling. This advertising technique is best evidenced by the most in your face pirate mascot of all, Captain Morgan. He tears back the pages of the magazine you're reading, just to show you what a great time you would be having if you were drunk. Well, drunk and attractive. Any mascot that's willing to ruin MY magazine is cool by me, but unfortunately the advertisements don't really show the true fun of Spiced Rum. Thankfully, the Forum Goons decided to change that. Check it out, G!
Are you concerned that you may be a character trapped in a Tom Waits song? Be smart and learn the warning signs before it's too late. Also, it's too late. It has always been too late.
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
The Comedy Goldmine examines the funniest and most creative threads from the Something Awful Forums. Although the Comedy Goldmine has changed authors many times over the years, its focus on the Something Awful Forums is still the same. Includes hilarious Photoshops, amusing work stories, parodies, and other types of oddball humor.