Thanks to Wombot for this picture.Thanks to Wombot for this picture.

XyZeR has unsheathed his mighty katana and is ready to show you what five years of studying The Matrix Reloaded can do.

There are simply no more signs that I can fit into this article, due to government legislation on excessive use of triangles. Thanks a bunch to my loyal army of forum goons, who would go to any lengths to MS Paint anything I so desire. Next week's Comedy Goldmine will be full of delicious recipes for Cajun cooking, so tell grandma and all her pals to look out for it!

– Craig "Russ" Russell

More Comedy Goldmine

This Week on Something Awful...

  • The Fandangling Fables of Groggery Gibbonman

    The Fandangling Fables of Groggery Gibbonman

    'We’re going to be in trouble!' Little Sister wailed, clutching her favorite book to her chest and sobbing. 'This isn’t fun like a story anymore!' But Big Sister was not listening, she was thinking. She grabbed Little Sister’s book from her and ran into town, yelling 'Help! A book made me and my sister hurt someone!'

  • Enter: the Lead Loremaster

    Enter: the Lead Loremaster

    I've been wanting to meet you all for the past few weeks, but I guess I cut an intimidating figure. I'm the new guy, with the cool job you've all surely been gossiping about. Yep, I'm the Lead Loremaster, and I'm here to enrich everything we do with much-needed lore.

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.