Etro's Beards
Dr. Thorpe: I knew that someday Flava Flav would influence trends in European high-fashion.
Zack: Can a brutha get a beard?
Dr. Thorpe: He's opening his coat and yelling "who stole my giant clock pendant?"
Zack: "Whoooo stole my beard?"
Dr. Thorpe: I wonder if he's just the cheap Italian knockoff of Flav. He stands behind Etro all day, occasionally yelling out "Yo, Etro, I still don't think these cats understand what you're trying to say! Hit em again with some big beards, man!"
Zack: If that's the case then he's saying "Fuck fuck fuck these guys who are making fun of us right now in their article"
Zack: The hat makes me think it's awfully cold, but then he's wearing half a sweater so I'm getting mixed messages.
Dr. Thorpe: It looks like he forgot to wear a bib when he went out to dinner and he spilled some wallpaper samples from 1972 all over his shirt.
Zack: Either that or he had a really bad lobster.
Dr. Thorpe: Yeah, like a surreal lobster.
Zack: He cracks a claw and cartoon rainbows comes out followed by unicorns and talking birds. I have to admit, though, I feel sort of hamstrung on this one because I keep thinking of things that are vaguely racist. Ohhh poor me and my white man's burden.
Dr. Thorpe: Aside from that, the red suit is actually sort of snazzy. I think it has its place in this world. Like maybe on the lead singer of some doofus teenage-girl band like Maroon 5 during a sham awards ceremony.
