Zack: Finally, a game that includes the handicapped! Sure, it's murdering them for mana points, but they have to start somewhere.
Zack: Jackie Robinson got his start being murdered by the negro leagues to teleport Babe Ruth and his massive circumference anus into the middle of a game against some cave trolls.
Steve: Subtly the creepiest thing on that list is that adults and young-adults are chained naked to an altar, but the old people and the babies are left clothed.
Zack: By the way, if you notice that number at the front of each item it has a lot of zeros. That's because this is one of many d1000 or greater random tables in the book.
Steve: Hey, sometimes the players want to know what sort of salt flakes to sprinkle over a naked 12 year old girl to give a bladder infection to a woman a mile away.
The first phase of The Olive Garden's cyber rollout will introduce their Neverending Pneumatic Pasta Tube. This works on the same principal as bank drive-thru deposit tubes, but with unfrozen linguini and spaghetti.
Do you remember the crazy clothes and hair of the 1990s? Do you remember Crystal Pepsi and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? Do you remember where you hid the box your mother gave you?
It's still okay to like Ben Stiller, guys.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.