Zack: Why does that short, fat dude have orb hands?
Zack: And why isn't that woman wearing any pants?
Steve: These are alien species that have evolved beyond the need for pants and hands.
Zack: I wonder what sort of environment naturally selects for orb hands. Giant bowling alley, possibly, or a megalopolis built as a sentient pinball table.
Steve: Maybe their only form of transportation is old-timey cannons.
Zack: Aliens look suspiciously like elves.Steve: What about that dog or kangaroo dude with the big tail? Not an elf.
Zack: At least he hasn't evolved beyond the need for pants.
Maria Mitchell is shown holding a telescope to each eye, using them to ogle passing hunks on the street below. OOOGA! Her tongue rolls out like a firehose, her eyes comically bulging through the ends of the telescopes.
The Internet experience of 2014 has been condensed into a single article for your convenience.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.