Zack: Why does that short, fat dude have orb hands?
Zack: And why isn't that woman wearing any pants?
Steve: These are alien species that have evolved beyond the need for pants and hands.
Zack: I wonder what sort of environment naturally selects for orb hands. Giant bowling alley, possibly, or a megalopolis built as a sentient pinball table.
Steve: Maybe their only form of transportation is old-timey cannons.
Zack: Aliens look suspiciously like elves.Steve: What about that dog or kangaroo dude with the big tail? Not an elf.
Zack: At least he hasn't evolved beyond the need for pants.
Are you concerned that you may be a character trapped in a Tom Waits song? Be smart and learn the warning signs before it's too late. Also, it's too late. It has always been too late.
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.