Zack: Welcome to our role playing world based on Cannibal Corpse album covers.
Steve: At least they look like they're having a good time. If you got it, flaunt it. And I mean torn off heads and bloody hooters.
Zack: Bloody hooters are a staple of Italian cinema. Everything Dario Argento has made is full of big, bloody hooters, including Asia Argento.
Steve: I bet she was conceived from a knife dramatically stabbing into a hooter.
Zack: Born with a Goblin soundtrack playing.
Steve: From a gargantuan gore-dripping hooter.
Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.
Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.
Ignore the hype. Find out how these games will likely go right or wrong.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.