Zack: Here it is: the single laziest piece of artwork in the Antiquities set. Painted by the prolific Douglas Shuler, apparently worn out from putting Tim & Eric beards on everything he paints he just half-assed a candelabra and dropped some sparkles on it.
Steve: What did you expect? It's a candelabra.
Zack: How about a massively busty wizard woman up on a cliff with storms raging all around her and she's holding up this glowing candelabra and the fire from the candles is swirling up into a tornado of fire that is changing night into day on the wide expanse of land below. That's right up your alley.
Steve: Pretty good, but not as good as "an awkward candelabra sitting on a peach tablecloth."
Cons: causes bad nightmares. I used to have to eat beef until I passed out to have these kind of terrors, but this machine does it for me every time I fall asleep inside it.
Sorry about the blurry photo. I was lunging at my phone, yelling at it to take a clear picture. It's the only image of me that exists. I'd take another picture for you, but I'm in the middle of a rigorous trampoline session.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.