Zack: Page after page of this crap. Ka this and amulet that, codes and sects and magical Egyptian spirits.
Steve: Yeah I know pretty awesome. We just watched the Mummy and the Mummy Returns and were pretty pumped up to make sand tornadoes appear.
Zack: Seems more like every other White Wolf game where your conscience is literally a magical spirit character and you have to fight him by doing good things in the world or he'll take over.
Steve: No, that's Wraith.
Zack: And Vampire and Werewolf.
Steve: I think it might happen in the Chinese Vampire stuff too if you eat too many yin-yangs or whatever, I don't remember how that worked.
Zack: *Ghostly voice appears from the sandy ether* "Don't mummy it up so much jeez. Put on a shirt. Stop eating life force"Steve: It's not a ghostly voice though I think it's like a giant bird head dude and he pulls your heart out or something.
Zack: So did you ever summon sand tornadoes?
Steve: They were in the Big Red section.
Are you concerned that you may be a character trapped in a Tom Waits song? Be smart and learn the warning signs before it's too late. Also, it's too late. It has always been too late.
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.