Zack: Clay jars, wrapped up, this is how we like to fuck.
Steve: I went to the Mummy exhibit at the museum with my class in like 5th grade and some of the hieroglyphic babes were hot as hell with their racks out and everything.
Zack: What about the mummies?
Steve: Well they were just regular mummies they weren't magical mummies so they weren't too hot. They looked sort of like beef jerky and hair.
Zack: Somewhere, in most benighted Internet, is a video of somebody humping a mummy.Steve: Gen Con 95 dude.
Simply put, if I had Johnny Manziel’s physical gifts, you better believe I would be there in the Weight Room, getting to bed early, doing whatever I had to do to be the best possible athlete I could be. I wouldn't be posting on social media about sucking titties. I wouldn't even look at a titty, buddy. I'd look at a titty and see two big footballs.
A real friend doesn't move until the middle of August, ensuring temperatures in the 90s and a humidity that turns boxers into moist balls of ruined cotton.
Expendable? You must be joking.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.