There are so many great and stupid gods in Deities & Demigods, but one of the unsung and forgotten treasures of that book is the appendix devoted to the cosmology of Dungeons & Dragons. This material was expanded upon and made even more complicated for The Manual of the Planes. That was much later. For now, sit back and enjoy the planes according to Deities & Demigods.
Steve: I told you it wasn't that complicated.
Zack: I guess. It's a lot easier than I remembered. Sort of like a cosmic Saturn with the elemental planes as the rings and positive and negative planes as the poles.
Steve: And the ethereal plane is space.
Zack: Okay, but it says it's broken out by alignment. Where does that go?
Steve: It's a chart you lay over the top, like if you're looking down.
Zack: I'm not sure I get it. So like each of those is related to their specific location?
Steve: No, it's just showing a generality.
Zack: But why even put this in with the planes?Steve: Because there are planes with alignment. See, they correspond to the alignments:
Zack: Alright, yeah, I get it.
Steve: See, it isn't that complicated.
Zack: But where do these correspond to on the first chart?
Zack: Now I'm completely lost.
Steve: Maybe this will help to explain everything:
Zack: Alright, got it! I think we're good to go.Steve: See, the bird headed guy shooting represents the Aztec Mythos as well as chaos.
Zack: Just stop right there. I think I'm going to vomit.Steve: That's a good sign. That means you've almost got it.
Are you concerned that you may be a character trapped in a Tom Waits song? Be smart and learn the warning signs before it's too late. Also, it's too late. It has always been too late.
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.