It's no surprise that the most vocal Insane Clown Posse fans are raging idiots. Anytime we even mention the "Insane Clown Posse" in any context, whether it be in a picture caption or a Cliff Yablonski update, the ICP fan sites report on it as if it was some kind of international breaking news. They convince their fellow readers to email us and show us the grievous error of our ways, but I'm not exactly sure how using an AOL account to repeatedly call somebody a "faggot" will convince them that your opinion is a fact. Now I don't want to make fun of AOL users by associating them with the Insane Clown Posse, but literally every single flame mail I've recently gotten was from an AOL account. So to all you high and mighty "I use Linux so therefore my penis is huge" people out there who mistakenly believe that AOL users are on the bottom of the food chain, I've got news for you - ICP fans who use AOL are, without a doubt, the most unintelligible, retarded, worthless group of subhuman CHUDs to ever bang upon a keyboard. Not only do they constantly call me a "faggot" for making fun of their rap band*, but they've sent me enough death threats to fill the Grand Canyon, assuming somebody could find a way to materialize raw stupidity. As a result, I went to one of their forums and found an ICQ number of one of the many, many enraged fans who loathed Something Awful for its horrendous assault on their favorite rap group. Since I know for a fact that no ICP hardcore fans have the ability to write in any coherent manner, my initial angle for this prank was to gradually make my messages more and more unintelligible to the point where "JuGGaLo" couldn't even understand what I was writing. However, I got slightly distracted and the prank ended up in a different way. Oh, and I have no idea why the guy chose to apparently voluntarily censor out curse words in the messages he sent me. All I know is that it was pretty fucking - er, f**king stupid - so I started doing the same later on.* For those of you who are curious, I don't really like or dislike the Insane Clown Posse. Hell, I've never even heard one of their songs before, so I don't have an opinion either way. However, I do have an opinion on their diehard, vocal, idiotic fans who think that their entire existence is defined by music they listen to. Besides, I have the worst taste in about everything, so I'm not really eligible to judge other people's music preferences.
Lowtax - Hey man, did you see that shit on Something Aweful about the ICP?
JuGGaLo - yeah man f**k that s**t, that a**hole can go suck off his gay Feminem fans
Lowtax - Yeah man, I totally think that too, I mean that shit he posted about the ICP was totally BS
JuGGaLo - yeh, u catch it from thesixth.com?
Lowtax - Yeah, I caught a lot of shit from thesixth.com man. That site is tight d00d. LOL that rhymes, maybe I should apply to be in the ICP
Lowtax - That site is tight
So bright I'll bite
and fight this kite
until MOTHAFUCKAHS REPRAZENT,
ONLY JIZZ USES THE TIFF
PNG FOR U AN ME< YIZZ YO
Lowtax - sorry, that was a little freestyle I do, people sometimes pay me to freestyle on ICQ
JuGGaLo - 's cool, so who ru?
Lowtax - Just another dawg looking for a boner man
Lowtax - I mean bone, sorry
JuGGaLo - whered u get my ICQ?.
Lowtax - Actually, do you want to know who I really am?
JuGGaLo - sure
Lowtax - I'm one of the guys who runs that Something Aweful site
JuGGaLo - wtf
JuGGaLo - f**k ya dude, ya site sucks crap, you be dissin us clowns u gona git beat DOWN, u f**kin wit da Juggalo NATION straight up ya hatah biatch
JuGGaLo - f**kin fag
Lowtax - Woah, woah, calm down man, dont hate the playah, hate the gain
The singer dove off the stage and crowd surfed in a sort of reverse funeral procession where the person being carried is the only one truly alive. Touching him I felt religious ecstasy and started speaking in tongues and requesting songs that didn't exist.
There's no easy way to put this, so I'll tell it like it is. Bouillon is died. He went missing before the weekend and yesterday I found his skeletonized remains at the bottom of the #3 soup vat during one of my swims. I thought the cream of mushroom soup had an especially nourishing taste, and a lot more clumps of fur and skin than usual.
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Our Something Awful ICQ pranks target the worst and most idiotic folks on the Internet. Believe it or not, these ICQ pranks are all - unfortunately - real.