Hydrogen: Ah, the age-old technique of seduction by ball-flashing.
Trillaphon: Tiananwomen Square will never forget this - the day this mountain of a man, this mythical adonis hoisted himself up on his mighty pommel steed and said "I Will Not Be Intimidated, I Will Not Be Controlled, I Will Not Adhere to Gym Dress Policies or the Timeless Oppression of Tight, Junk-Tyrannizing Undershackles-"
Hydrogen: ...I had 50 jokes ready about this scene, but none of them can possibly begin to approach the pommel horse in the middle of "Tiananwomen Square". Carry on.
Trillaphon: "REMEMBER BOYS, THEY CAN TAKE OUR MEMBERSHIP CARDS AND COMPLIMENTARY LANYARDS, BUT THEY CAN NEVER TAKE OUR FREEDOM!" And so it was, that day at the Hanging of the Brain.
Are you concerned that you may be a character trapped in a Tom Waits song? Be smart and learn the warning signs before it's too late. Also, it's too late. It has always been too late.
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
Something Awful reviews the absolute worst movies out there. We focus mostly on horror and science fiction, because all writers here on Something Awful are huge nerds.