Trillaphon: That is the worst analogy in the history of the English language, for so many reasons. I'm sure she was relieved to die from having a flaming rose shoved down her throat after having to listen to that.
Hydrogen: Apparently human trafficking involves more leather trenchcoats than a Mad Max movie, and guys with slicked-back hair who think they're philosopher kings for some reason. Now I'm convinced it's a serious problem we need to wipe out as soon as possible.
Trillaphon: The whole "Napoleon" thing makes it seem like he and Seagal are life-long nemeses, but as far as we can tell from the rest of the movie, they've never met before.
Trillaphon: I want to learn the martial-arts school where wild falcons follow you around all the time and screech for dramatic impact.
Hydrogen: And where you can astral project your giant bloated head over the sky to terrify children.
Trillaphon: Going by the quality of the swordsmanship here I'm going to guess the bad guy had a personal fencing coach, and Seagal had a personal catering team of six.
Hydrogen: And so, Steven Seagal wandered the forest forevermore in search of more injured animals, because they are biologically the only ones who cannot escape his crushing presence.
|Music / Sound||-6|
It's time to get a new TV. Your old one was made like two years ago, and so much has changed. You might as well be looking at a dinosaur's butthole. Why would you keep doing that, when you could be looking at a robot's butthole?
This libtard terminator keeps asking for guns that don't exist and I may have to close early out of frustration.
My game is funded. Now I know everything.
Sea of Thieves: Reduced the number of quest types from 3 to 2
Something Awful reviews the absolute worst movies out there. We focus mostly on horror and science fiction, because all writers here on Something Awful are huge nerds.