The Poorman's Honey Crisp Apple
The this is so disgustingly sour if someone told me it was genetically identical to vomit I would not be surprised in the slightest Apple
The Michelle Obama wanted children to eat, like, four of these every lunch but most just ended up in the trash Apple
The Me in Apple Form Apple
The Jesus I knew we should have gone apple picking earlier in the season because this is the only apple left Apple
The mealy afterthought garbage excuse from a continental breakfast at the bedbug infested motel you stayed at when your dumb friend guilted you to go to Comic-Con, promising a fun weekend, but then he just spent the entire time dressed as Deadpool while making really forced and outdated "the cake is a lie" jokes Apple
The PineApple hybrid touted as 'the next big thing' by the orchard, but really makes you question the ethics of GMO use within the modern food industry Apple
The why the hell did I take fifteen of these--I don't even like apples Apple
The I don't think you're supposed to eat that Apple
The every other tree on the orchard is swarming with idiots perfecting their Instagram selfies, so I guess I'll just grab a bunch of these Apple
The next year I'm going to just go to the grocery and get a dozen of these at 1/1,000th of the cost Apple
Evil Cooper and Chechen President Ramzan Kadyrov have both been on a rampage, but who did what?
"Your left eye," the optometrist casually explained while blasting my face with a blue laser at point blank range, "is farsighted and shaped like an eyeball. The other eye is nearsighted and shaped like a football. Not even a good football."
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