If only they could talk !, submitted by Charlseth. If you still haven't decided on this summer's religion, perhaps this website can help you out! "If Only They Could Talk" explains how to trick innocent children into believing the Word of the Lord through the time-honored technique of envisioning a planet where vegatables can verbally communicate with humans. Sounds like a nightmare to me.

# Finally find a cabbage.
# Ask "if this cabbage could talk what might it say?".
# By now the congregation should be well into participating with you and quickly give the answer. The cabbage says, "Use your heart - Love someone".
# If you are using OHP or flash cards this might an appropriate point to post it up.
# Talk about what it means to love "with all our hearts".
# Jesus teaches us that if really love people we will want to do something to help them. The Bible teaches us that doing even good things, but without love, is no what God really wants from us. Loving and doing good are equally important.
# So perhaps the humble cabbage has the most important message of all!

Er, yeah, perhaps the cabbage does. Or perhaps this whole thing is just a little too weird for me.

– Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka (@lowtax)

More Awful Link of the Day

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.

  • BarkWire.com Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver

    BarkWire.com Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver

    Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.